How Would I Like To Feel?
Do you begin your mornings with some form of the question, “What is it I want to do today?” Implicitly, you are giving yourself permission to be happy only after you have accomplished everything on your list. You know what I mean: “Once I do this, then I can relax.” Or, “When I make that sale, I’ll be happy.”
That’s backwards—achievements stem from positive feelings, not the other way around, and a far more powerful question is: “How would I like to feel today?”
In short, the formula is: Feel, Do, Have!
Let’s say that today you want to feel:
· Excited about your work
· Successful at what you do
· Grateful for what the day has brought
Next, ask yourself, “What do I want to have?” How about:
· Tasks well done
· Your work organized for the rest of the week
· Clear progress toward a goal
Pondering how you want to feel and what you want to have, you’ll see exactly what you must do to achieve those desired feelings and results. Approach life in this sequence, and you’ll go quickly from one action to another, with real enthusiasm. As for the hoped-for results, they will follow as a matter of course.
Let’s consider a few examples. If you were to focus on how it feels to be a skilled manager, wouldn’t it be far easier to supervise others than if you had to refer constantly to a guidebook so that you trusted in your leadership abilities?
Or, if you were to focus on feeling energetic, wouldn’t it make sense that you would have more of the stamina needed to achieve the results that you want?
And if you were to focus on how it feels to be organized about your work, wouldn’t you approach tasks systematically?
All of us tend to rush headlong into our days. We wake, and we immediately make a mental list of what awaits us to be done. We review it endlessly and grow anxious. Then we speed to work, frantic to start, only to arrive and procrastinate guiltily over coffee because we can’t face an overwhelming workload.
This happens because our minds are stuck in “do.” As we plunge into work without first determining how we want to feel and what results we want to have, we resemble an inexperienced driver. He slides behind the wheel, buckles up, angles all the mirrors and hits the gas. Yet, because he didn’t establish beforehand that he wants to feel that he’s truly going somewhere and that he wants to have reached his destination, he may forget to slip the key into the ignition and start the car. So for all his doing, he gets nowhere.
Today, when you become anxious about your to-do list, stop. Ask yourself:
· How would I like to feel?
· What would l like to have?
You will be amazed at how much easier the day proceeds from there!