Bloom Where You’re Planted

My life is certainly different than I thought it would be. How about you? The longer I live, the more I come to understand that each of us has at least one area that isn’t the way we think it should be. What is that old saying? “Man makes plans and God laughs.”

I thought Bill and I would have many years together before we were separated by death. I was wrong.

Some of you have children with problems you could never have anticipated when you first saw their beautiful faces.

Many of you have borne seemingly unbearable sorrows or are living with pain even as I write this.

My friend Elaine is currently in the thick of it. For many many years she has had to watch her husband struggle with a painful and debilitating disease. What’s remarkable about Elaine is that she is amazingly good at blooming wherever she’s planted. No matter what life serves up, she takes the hit and then finds a way to adapt.

What’s equally amazing to me is that, to many, Elaine’s approach to life might seem selfish. Why? Because Elaine always makes sure her needs are met, sometimes before those of her partner. I don’t mean to say that she would leave him in the lurch in any way but she does make sure that she’s taken care of because she intuitively understands that she needs to stay healthy on all fronts if she is to be of maximum help to him when he needs it.

2015_02_19_feetElaine is my hero because she has learned to focus on what she can control. She cannot control the decisions her husband makes about his own care; she cannot control how quickly his condition progresses and she certainly can’t control the fact that it’s happening at all. What she can and does control is taking care of her own needs and doing whatever she can to have a satisfying and happy life despite the circumstances.  So she enjoys life as much as she can, indulging her love of dance by taking classes, routinely going for foot massage and reflexology and basking in whatever comes along that makes her laugh. And oh, what a laugh she has!

Elaine’s example is primarily why I like to spread the word about the Law of Attraction that says, “You get more of what you focus on.”  In the face of circumstances we cannot change, the most important tool in our possession is the ability to place our focus elsewhere.

Yesterday was a tough day for me. I was missing Bill and sometimes, when I’m down I begin to dwell on his last days.  I am so grateful to have the wherewithal to shift my focus to the fun times—those heady days when we were falling in love and the world was our oyster.

I was also facing a certain amount of fear about my business and whether I would survive financially. But again, I had to ask myself the same question I ask my coaching clients when they are facing the same fear, “Is everything okay right now? Do you have everything you need?” and the answer, thankfully, is, “Yes. I certainly do.”

treeChange your focus, change your life is not merely a slogan for my business. It is the way I like to live my life. I am grateful that the Universe puts into my path people like Elaine who remind me when I’ve forgotten. What a gift!

Who is a teacher in your life who is fully using the Law of Attraction to thrive?  Who is teaching you to bloom where you’re planted?

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Audrey - March 13, 2015

Having met you so long ago at a employment training conference continues to be proof the GOD connects individual long before the need arises…when I lost my husband of 38 years in July of last year, I was in a completed fog. Somewhere in it all I remembered your writings surrounding Bill’s transition, and started re-reading. You have helped me process and find my new normal gracefully and with purpose, for this I am eternally grateful.

Finding my new normal without my LOVE has become easier as I refocused on ME. Thank you again for reminding me that I AM PLANTED already, can’t wait to see the new blossoms…

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